Subject: A Golf Story
The Wife — “Where the hell have you been? You said you’d be done with golf by noon.”
Husband — “I’m so sorry Honey . . . but you probably don’t want to hear the reason.”
The Wife — “I want the truth, and I want it NOW!”
Husband — “Fine. We finished in under 4 hours; a quick beer in the Clubhouse. I hopped into the car, and would have been here by 12 noon but on the way home, I spotted a girl half our age struggling with a flat tire.
“I changed it in a jiffy, and next she’s offering me money. Of course I refuse it, then she tells me she was headed to the bar at the Sheraton and begs me to stop by so she can buy me a beer. She’s such a sweetie, I said yes.
“Before you know it, one beer turned into three or four, and I guess we were looking pretty good to each other.
“Then she tells me she has a room right there at the Sheraton, less than 50 steps from our table. She suggested we get some privacy while pulling me by the hand.
“Now I’m in her room . . . clothes are flying . . . the talking stopped and we proceeded to have sex in every way imaginable. It must have gone on for hours, because before I know it, the clock says 5:30. I jump up, throw my clothes on, run to the car, and here I am.
“There. You wanted the truth . . . You got it.”
The Wife — “Bullshit! You played 36 holes, didn’t you?”
Subject: A Golf Story — The Alternate Version
The Husband — “Where the hell have you been? You said you’d be done with golf by noon.”
Wife — “I’m so sorry Honey . . . but you probably don’t want to hear the reason”
The Husband — “I want the truth, and I want it NOW!”
Wife — “Fine. We finished in under 4 hours; a quick glass of wine in the Clubhouse. I hopped into the car, and would have been here by 12 noon but on the way home, I spotted a man half our age struggling with a flat tire.
“I changed it in a jiffy, and next he’s offering me money. Of course I refuse it, then he tells me he was headed to the bar at the Sheraton and begs me to stop by so he can buy me a glass of wine. He’s such a sweetie, I said yes.
“Before you know it, one glass turned into three or four, and I guess we were looking pretty good to each other.
“Then he tells me he has a room right there at the Sheraton, less than 50 steps from our table. He suggested we get some privacy while pulling me by the hand.
“Now I’m in his room . . . clothes are flying . . . the talking stopped and we proceeded to have sex in every way imaginable. It must have gone on for hours, because before I know it, the clock says 5:30. I jump up, throw my clothes on, run to the car, and here I am.
“There. You wanted the truth . . . You got it.”
The Husband — “Bullshit! You played 36 holes, didn’t you?”
