On their way to the church to get married, a young Catholic couple were involved in a fatal car accident.
Being good Catholics, the young couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven.
While waiting, they begin to wonder: could they possibly get married in Heaven?
When St. Peter finally showed up, they asked him.
St. Peter said “I don’t know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out,” and he leaves them sitting at the Gate.
After three months, St. Peter finally returns, looking somewhat bedraggled. “Yes,” he informs the couple, “I can get you married in Heaven.”
“Great!” said the couple, “But we were just wondering, what if things don’t work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?”
“You must be bloody joking,” says St. Peter, red-faced with frustration, slamming his clipboard on the ground.
“What’s wrong?” asked the frightened couple.”
“OH, COME ON!” St. Peter shouted “It took me three months to find a priest up here…..Do you have any idea how long it’ll take me to find a lawyer?”
Or Marriage in . . .
A guy brings his best golf buddy home, unannounced, for dinner at 6:30 PM after enjoying a day of golf.
His wife screams her head off while his friend sits at the kitchen table, open mouthed, listening to the tirade.
“My hair and makeup are not done; the house is a f__king mess, and the dishes are still in the sink. I’m completely exhausted! I didn’t get enough sleep last night. Can’t you see I’m still in my f__king pajamas? I can’t be bothered with cooking tonight! Why the f__k did you bring him home without letting me know ahead of time, you stupid asshole???”
“Because … he’s thinking of getting married…”